He's bitched for years

about girls not liking him. I know why now. Under that witty exterior, he is completely selfish and ungrateful. Only he comes first, ever. Mailing a package is too much trouble? FUCK YOU. You are lucky you had someone like me in your life for as long as you did. It is a pity you are so self centered that you can't recognize the fact that someone who was generous and kind to you is "threatening". Yeah, threatening like a decent human being is threatening to the solitude of male singleness. I'm laughing that you are dealing with UTI's and early mornings with a school teacher. You deserve each painful pee and each tired moment of your day. You certainly didn't deserve my love nor friendship, when this is how you end up treating a /good/friend. Just send me my stuff, k? Then I can finally get this nagging, bothersom issue out of my life.

I feel amazingly good

Dad was here for a month. He's definitely aged in the past year. Congestive heart failure is my guess, though he doesn't even know why the doctor put him on pills that make him pee all the time and "something" for his heart.

My divorce is now final. David is a good man, just not for me. I'm excited to get my life back, but also that I think this arrangement will work. He's looking for a woman to date, via Match.com. Good luck to him.

My oldest son is 16 today. He amazes me. He's caring, smart, attractive, and thoughtful. His dad didn't get him a birthday gift (that either of us knew about, at least), so I felt a bit sorry for him. Jon was okay, though. He said that his Christmas presents were expensive and I did get him some new shorts yesterday, so Jon's considering those as gifts, too. He got an electric razor from me. He also preferred a home-made cake to store bought. Triple lemon! It was good, too.

Life goes on. I'm not as pissed at other things, too. I know I'm very special and I bring much to the table. I can't make anyone appreciate me, but I do appreciate myself, very much. Thanks Elis for what you told me about how you saw a future partner. I needed to hear that it is a reasonable request for myself.

Do I ask a second time?

Dec 1st I asked to have my things sent back to me. His answer, "but of course." I have not received any of my things back. I'm sure the answer is "I've been rather busy lately," but the real answer is that it's just not a priority. The things? A DVD that my kids like to watch, a bathrobe, a few rulers, a few yogurt container tops, and anything else I may have left behind.

Do I ask again? Do I just replace the items? I guess I need to accept the fact that he's not the man I thought he was; one who took care of business and did things for his friends.

Update: I asked again, In a nice way. I thought of writing it off and replacing the items, but I knew that it would still bother me. I sort of feel like a mom needing to teach her child manners. Yes, it's easier for me to just replace my things, but then the point isn't made. You treat people with respect and you do what is required of you, even if it's a pain in the butt. Yes, it's harder for me to have to ask again, but it gets the "child" to learn how to treat people.

it's not from too much coffee

A bladder infection is not from too much coffee. It's from fucking like bunnies without a condom. Antibiotics will help. Antibiotics make birth control pills less effective. I'm sure she has a UTI, too. Male urethrea are longer, thus less prone to infection. If a guy has a UTI, his sex partner surely has one, too. I predict parenthood before the end of the year.

Sometimes we make choices by not choosing.

And so it goes

The saying is "what goes around comes around", so I've heard. I'm not sure I believe this, and yet I wonder.

I've often wondered if I can break the habits learned over my lifetime. I was at dinner, talking about my Master's degree which is now just 2 courses away. My sister and dad were talking about the program and what it's like to take an online class. The next day we are eating out. The server isn't very good. She serves food, but there are no eating implements. We have to ask for water three times. Dad makes the comment that she must have been taking an online course, but didn't yet finish the program for waitressing. I sort of shake my head. Dad, I say, are you insulting my degree? You do realize that what you just said, implies that an online degree is worthless.

I notice, members of my family don't apologize readily. I've also noticed how little people actually listen to what others have to say. I've been trying to listen, and I think I've finally gotten a few messages loud and clear. I'm glad now of the things I have learned. Hind-site is indeed 20/20.