Many of us have learned (at least nurses have) about the 5 stages of loss, initially written about by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross. The stages are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. All stages must be experienced in order to process the loss and to heal.
I know I'm going through these stages. I know I'm processing through the denial and the anger. I'll know I'll get to the acceptance, in time. I am a strong woman and I do have good judgement. I also want to get to the place where I can appreciate Tom for all he is without feeling the pain of loss. I do want to be his friend, if nothing else.